drawn to the horizon as if it waited just for usto the future, the old to the past.
Rich people are not like us. Psychologists amassed evidence that the upper classes are more prone to behaving badly, from being oblivious to other road users, lying at work and taking treats meant for children
The U.S. pays $1.2B to a German firm to halt offshore wind projects. (Fact. Not from the Onion.)
Tax evasion (a.k.a. cheating) costs the US Treasury $600B a year.
New Orleans will use AI to answer 911 calls instead of a human. Hmm.
I used to be able to call my grandmother by telling the operator '35, please' and call home by saying '74, please'. Now I tell Siri 'call granny' or 'call home'. Seems about the same to me except less polite and granny is my wife.
The 1789 storming of the Bastille marked the start of the French Revolution. The prison held only seven inmates: four forgers, two lunatics, and one deviant aristocrat.
The only thing Trump cares about is erasing Biden/Obama legacy, punishing those he hates and satiating his personal greed. And of course, rebuilding D.C. to his own unique aesthetic.
Monumental madness.
Do you think cockleburs were in the original creation spec or the result of Adam's fall?
When in doubt, mumble.
Ah, Minnesota State Fair season. The roar of the greasepaint, the smell of the crowd.
Why do so many obits picture man with fish?
Minnesota Twins fan optimism officially ends annually on Sep 1st.
Are there ever fist fights at your book club meetings?
US researchers are emigrating to Canada in droves.
57% of Americans placed a bet last year. 38% read a book.
The biggest surprise in a man’s life is old age. Ben Kingsley
I was 50 for years and years, then suddenly 75.
As you age, your fingernails grow faster. And your ears too, I'm told.
How would you know if you met an extraterrestrial?
Ukraine has redefined how wars are fought now, obsoleting modern weaponry.
The 6000 tanks in the US arsenal are all destined for city parks.
An effective military takes more than guys who can do 100 pushups.
And a lesson learned for the umpteenth time. You cannot bomb your way to victory.
Milk and bread and eggs are always in the very back of the supermarket. This is so you have a chance to grab chips, cookies and sodas on your way to checkout.
Pain is a lonely solo flight.
Have you hired a plumber lately? Uffda. My father would be shocked.
When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. Eric Hoffer
Everyone has value. You can always serve as a bad example.
Bribed with your own money. Creative.
Can anyone explain why the US voted NO on the UN's proposed more accurate world map? 164-1
Trust between nations takes years to build and minutes to squander. Same with friends.
Pillow guy Lindell cries voting fraud. And then demands but then withholds payment for a recount. Who could have predicted?
I'm getting really tired of all the profanity in political ads. And elsewhere.
I am deluged with "urgent" text messages from politicians. I may block them all forever more.
Teenage girls seem to revel in cruelty to each other.
Zombie malls.
A wealth tax seems necessary to bring down the debt, but seems unfair to American farmers, many of whom are land rich/cash poor. Oligarchs can hide assets and sell a few shares of Tesla, farmers not so much and land doesn't really fit through a loophole. Create one for farmland.
GLP-1 weight loss products sell @ $500/mo and cost $5 to produce.
I am beginning to wonder about the seriousness of WAPO. Headline: "Tow truck drivers save kitten by dismantling a car in a drive-through". Is this newsworthy?
Minnesotans. Go and live in another state for a couple years before you start ragging on your home state.
Minnesota is the hardest state to get people to move to - and the hardest to get people to move from.
Publishing an 85 year old man's diary to embarrass him is repulsive, not to mention an invasion of privacy.
Qatar Force One. Not up to snuff.
Happiness with two is doubled.
Scientists are such romantics. "Non-agonistic interactions involving directed, infraspecific oral-oral contact with some movement of the lips/mouthparts and no food transfer."
That "no food transfer" is key.
We have known the consequences of climate change for decades and have largely ignored them. Same with AI and data centers it appears.
Technology designed for good is invariably subverted to bad.
Vote. If mail-in, don’t trust USPS. Bring your ballot to a drop box.
I appeal to you. Do not vote for a candidate when the only thing they offer is loyalty to Trump.
When someone asked W.H. Auden why nobody knew about Stanley Kunitz, Auden said: "It's strange, but give him time. A hundred years or so. He's a patient man." Kunitz was appointed poet laureate when he was 95 years old.
I ain't buyin' my kid no encyclopedia. He can walk to school just like I did. Yogi Berra
I never really said all those things I said. Yogi Berra
Surprise. DOGE grossly overstated savings.
DHS policy says ICE will release body camera video only when seen in the agency’s ‘best interests’ .
Every time I am tempted by a new bike, I look in the mirror at the old guy and conclude the one I've got will easily outlast me.
Vertical pavements cracks put the fear of God in me.
I’ve reached the age where the low gears have high value and the high gears have low value.
You know those scroll lists to pick your year of birth? It's a long ways down.
I fear the only thing that can save this nation is a Republican thought revolution.
Don't be wearing sandals when standing in front of a urinal.
Get your shots.
What's a book that you have read more than once?
One of the DC trees they have cut down is a cherry tree.
Canada supplies almost all the lumber the US uses for framing houses.
I miss the Burma Shave road signs, although they were a driving hazard.
Though love goes cold
Do not despair
There's Yspilanti underwear.
BURMA SHAVE
The Singularity has arrived.
Copyright © 2026 Dave Hoplin
"Why do so many obits picture man with fish?" Never considered this whatsoever, but typing your question into a search engine brings back many essays on why so many dating apps feature pictures of men holding a fish. So, either the obit writers look at a man's dating app to find an appropriate photo - or else these dating apps are much more lethal than they at first seem, due to wives discovering them, resulting in the obituaries. (Of course a fair question to one's wife with one's dying breath might be "why were you on a dating app too?")
ReplyDeleteI think you should volunteer to guest blog for me and answer all the questions I pose.
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