Monday, May 2, 2022

Shakespeare's 1st Drafts

"The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he is really very good - in spite of all the people who say he is very good." - Robert Graves

Shakespeare, the "Bard of Avon", is considered THE master wordsmith of the English language.  Tis a pity that reading Shakespeare has seemed to fallen from favor in this tweet length attention span age. There's even a wonderfully humorous novel 'The Shakespeare Requirement', written by University of Minnesota professor Julie Schumacher, about an attempt to relegate Will to the dustbin. 

However, you almost certainly speak much more Shakespeare than you realize. Many common idioms have Shakespeare to thank. 

'There is a method to the madness.' 
'Too much of a good thing'.  
'Give the devil his due'.  
'As luck would have it'. 
'What the dickens'. 
'It's Greek to me'.
'Love is blind'.
"Off with his head.'
'What's done is done'.
'Neither here nor there'.
'The world's my oyster'.
'Milk of human kindness'.
'Discretion is the better part of valor.'
'Forever and a day'. (I always thought this was a Scandinavian thing). 

Now, don't you feel like a scholar?

But even Shakespeare had to make revisions to his writing to achieve such perfection. I have uncovered early drafts of some of his plays and I here share some misfires he corrected.

1. To be, or not to be: that is the question. (Hamlet)

Draft: To be or not to be, do be do be do.

2. The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars. but in ourselves. (Julius Caesar)

Draft: The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in whom we put our trust

3. The course of true love never did run smooth. (A Midsummer Night's Dream)

Draft: It’s a long and winding road that leads to your door

4. If I lose mine honour, I lose myself. (Antony and Cleopatra)

Draft: If I lose mine honour, there's always charm to fall back on

5. All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players. (As You Like It)

Draft: All the world's a stage, with wheels falling off at every turn.

6. Now is the winter of our discontent. (Richard III)

Draft: Now is the winter of our sniffling malcontent

7. Brevity is the soul of wit. (Hamlet)

Draft: Brevity is the soul of wit, by the half 

8. Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em. (Twelfth Night)

Draft: Be not afraid of greatness, tis unlikely.

9. Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. (All's Well That Ends)

 Draft: Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none - live the fantasy

10. Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow. (Romeo and Juliet)

Draft: Good night, Mrs Calabash, wherever you are

11. But I will wear my heart upon my sleeve. (Othello)

Draft: I would wearest my heart upon my sleeve, but I wipest my nose upon my sleeve

12. There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy. (Hamlet)

Draft: There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than halos and fruitcakes.

13. Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? (Romeo & Juliet)

Draft: Romeo, Romeo. You're late again.

14. Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. (Measure for Measure) 

Draft: Lucio, Just go for it.

15. We are such stuff as dreams are made on. (The Tempest)
Draft: This is a bloody nightmare.
16. The lady doth protest too much, methinks. (Hamlet) 
Draft: The lady doth think to much, me protesteth
17. What's in a name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. (Romeo & Juliet) 

Draft: What is in a name? Rosencrantz and Guilderstern not withstanding.

18. The worst is not, so long as we can say 'This is the worst'. (King Lear)
Draft: This is definitely the worst.
19. All that glisters is not gold. (The Merchant of Venice) 

Draft: All that glitters is impossible to sweep up

20. Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears: I come to bury Caesar,  not to praise him. (Julius Caesar) 

Draft: Friends Romans countrymen, lend me your ears. I come to mislead you

21. Cry havoc! and let slip the dogs of war (Julius Caesar) 

Draft: Cry havoc and let slip the vicious dogs of mass destruction 

22. A horse! a horse! my kingdom for a horse! (Richrd III) 
Draft: Where is that damned horse?
23. What light through yonder window breaks. (Romeo and Juliet)

Draft: Romeo, will you at long last, fix that blind?

24. .. a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. (Macbeth)

Draft: .. a tale told by idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying a marvelous book title

25. To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. (Hamlet) 

Draft: To thine own self be true, and it must follow, get thee to a nunnery

26. Et tu, Brute? (Julius Caesar)

Draft: Brutus. You’re impossible.

27. Lord, what fools these mortals be! (A Midsummer Night’s Dream)

Draft: Fools rush in where wise men fear to tread

28. Men of few words are the best men (Henry V)
Draft: Men of few words are the best men, thus condemning the writer.
29. The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones. (Julius Caesar)

Draft: The evil that men do beggars belief. The good oft goes beggaring.

30.  Out, damned spot! out (Macbeth)

Draft: Beatrice, remember to pick up some Lifebuoy.

31. What a piece of work is man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals!  (Hamlet)

Draft: What a piece of work is man. How noble in reason. How infinite in faculty. Give me a head of hair, long beautiful hair, shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen

32. Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and cauldron bubble (Macbeth)

Draft: Double, double toil and trouble; Soak and steam, bath of bubble

33. Have more than thou showest, speak less than thou knowest, lend less than thou owest. (King Lear)

Draft: Don’t be an ass

34. My salad days, when I was green in judgment. (Antony and Cleopatra)

Draft: My salad days are over. Kale and hardy am I not

35. The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. (Merchant of Venice)

Draft: Dear me, Good King James must clarify

36. When the hurlyburly 's done. When the battle's lost and won.  (Macbeth)

Draft: Do the hokey pokey. That’s what it’s all about


Copyright ©  2022  Dave Hoplin

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