When I was 10, I was pretty confident that I was destined to replace Woody Held as the Cleveland Indian’s shortstop (my favorite team at the time). That dream was cruelly disabused when Denny Danielson fanned me on 3 pitches in the bottom of the 7th with the bases loaded and two outs. Strike out looking. Game over. Humiliation. As a result even I realized that the “Big Show” was not in my future. So next up: firefighter, cowboy, frontiersman.
Fast forward. After getting my Masters degree in Bozeman, MT, I put in a year teaching in Hamburg, Germany (a story for another time). In the summer of 1972, Carol & I with our 1 year old son returned to Minnesota planning to continue my teaching career. However, I needed education credits to procure a Minnesota teaching certificate. So I enrolled at the U of M, Morris (a story for another time) and we settled into my grandparents home in Lowry and … I became a full-fledged volunteer fireman in the Lowry Fire Department. Voila, my childhood backup plan dream was realized. However, imagination and reality often diverge.
The above paragraphs illustrate some of my life's many crossroads and demonstrates that our lives - at least mine - are less like a GPS defined journey than a endless series of decisions. In our 20's, there seems so much time, ample for hundreds of decisions, indecisions and revisions. And before you know it, the decisions made and unmade shape our decades.
Looking back on the crossroads in my life, I'm not sure I recognized the significance of my turns. The ability to predict long term is a fuzzy lens. And the idea that we always use well-reasoned, analytical approaches to decisions is largely myth I believe. Some people seem to have an unwavering focus on their destiny but for most of us, it is much muddier. Serendipity even. Generally, we go on emotion, with what "feels right". And I'm not sure that's a bad thing. A trusted friend occasionally or family member frequently (e.g. wife) influences. Or a whispered prayer. But at crunch time, "trusting your gut" is often a good course.
College? Well, Dad went there - should be good. MSU? Really pretty country out there - should be good. Hamburg? US teaching positions in short supply - should be good. Quit teaching to do software? What could go wrong - should be good. Join that startup company? Ditto. I like that car color. That house has a great backyard. And so forth and so forth.
I rarely dwell on the past - except when writing a post like this - and it's clear there is much more of my past than my future. I have matured enough to accept I'm unlikely to get out of this alive. No one survives the future. The secret to living old and thriving is to stay interested. And try to hang around people who command respect rather than attention. It's better for your well being.
I have been blessed. In fact, I’m actually in Lou Gehrig territory.
A friend protested my Cleveland Indian loyalty. In my defense, this was the 50's and the Minnesota Twins did not exist - being a Senators fan was beyond the pale.
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