Indelible

Everyone has moments in their lives that leave an indelible imprint on the memory, moments that bring back a vivid image and the flood of emotions that accompanied them.  Moments of joy, of grief, of pride, of fear, of horror, of awe.

I have a chronology of these kinds of events stashed in my hippocampus recallable, at times by conscious thought, but often triggered by some happening seemingly unrelated to the memory. 

I share here but a sample of my inner self.

1. My earliest flashback memory is one of fear, having gotten myself lost in Powers Department Store in Minneapolis at some tender young age. I went up an escalator and could not figure out how to get back down. That fear is palpable.
2. I misspelled 'cheif' in the county spelling bee. Shame.
3. The Cuban Missile Crisis.  This is not a sharp image but rather the fuzzy memory of days of angst that nuclear devastation was looming. 
4. The Kennedy assassination November 22, 1963.  I was in high school and I relive those moments in a study hall when Walter Cronkite removed his glasses and announced to the world that Kennedy was dead. Then following in succession Martin Luther King & Bobby Kennedy
5. Tagging out Kerkhoven's Wayne Carlson at 2nd base, he 4 feet off the bag and the umpire Phil MacIver calling him safe. The anger is still real.  Go figure.
6. A standing-room-only train trip to Seattle with a young child (not mine) on my knee.
7. The joy of my wedding day
8. Augsburg College graduation with Hubert Humphrey as commencement speaker.  But I remember not a word of his oration. More vivid is the cigar I smoked afterward - so dizzy & nauseous I had to lay down.
9. The moon landing accompanied by a burst of wonder and pride of country.
10. Rescuing a drunken prof in Conrad, Montana while a student at Montana State University.
11. The Watergate hearings and the sonorous voices of Barbara Jordan and Sam Ervin.
12. The awe and wonder of the birth of my children
13. My first day in a classroom at Charlotte-Paulson Gymnasium in Hamburg, Germany, trying to communicate auf Deutsch.
14. The reception we received at the home of my wife’s great aunt in Leksvig, Norway.  They raised the Norwegian flag above their home.
15. The death of my mother at age 58.  The unfairness and awful depths of grief.
16. The Challenger explosion.  I was at work at Control Data and the shock of the images scarred me.
17. The elation of Twins World Series wins in 1987 & 1991.  It was as if my love of baseball had been rewarded - finally. 
18. The icy Wacouta bridge in St. Paul ending with my truck perched atop a trailer.
19. The pride at our childrens’ graduation from college. 
20. 9/11. Transfixed by the horror
21. Birth of my grandchildren and the endless joy they bring to us
22. Sandy Hook.  Tears and anger beyond anger.
23. When the family was visiting my father in his final days, as we were leaving, my ten year old grandson asked us if this was the last time we would see him.  We had to say yes. He turned around and ran back to the room to give a last hug.  The tears still come.
24. The death of my father. The hardest hit of all. We talk daily.
25. A retirement day.  Sadness and joy mixed.
26. This old man flying over the handlebars of his bicycle. I can clearly recall the landing but the flight is a mirage.

And now January 6, 2021, a confederate flag in the US Capitol. 

Copyright ©  2021  Dave Hoplin